Hey Kaleigh!

Tag: personal-growth

  • Becoming the Person I Already Am

    Image from Pexels

    When I was a child, I chose pink as my favorite color and never looked back.

    And now, twenty years later, no one questions it. They just accept it. I accept it too, without thinking. But sometimes I wonder how often we move through life on autopilot. 

    Sometimes the kindest thing you can do for yourself is to pause. To soften. To sit with yourself long enough to ask the questions you’ve been avoiding.

    Ask yourself why you feel the need to overexplain.

    Ask yourself what brings you joy.

    Tenderly, let yourself hear the answers.

    And do not worry if you change a little each day. I worry about myself more often than I admit. Sometimes I think I’m too timid, too mousy, too afraid of being misread.

    Then comes the guilt. The feeling that sweating over your small crisis is immature.

    But some messes just show that a room is lived in, not neglected.

    You don’t have to be mysterious. You don’t have to speak in riddles. You are allowed to share what feels right and keep what feels tender. You are free to have your own boundaries.

    When I was in college, I tried so hard to balance who I was and who I wanted to be. Not in some dramatic identity crisis. It was questioning what I could and couldn’t share. When I felt ashamed, I constantly challenged the validity of my emotions.

    Eventually, I learned that self-interrogation doesn’t lead to clarity. It just builds noise. And once you stop performing the character you’ve been playing for years, there’s this strange, open silence. It’s like stepping into an empty room and hearing your own breathing for the first time.

    I think that’s the weirdest part of growing up: understanding there is no singular real you ready to be uncovered. No grand prize after years of quietly curating the perfect you. There is just the you who exists in the now, the you who is still being formed.

    The real you shows up in the thoughtful choices you make when no one is watching. In the things you gravitate toward without thinking. In the hobbies you keep coming back to, even when you convince yourself it is silly. In the way you exhale around the people who make you feel seen.

    You are not a performance. You are not an aesthetic. You are more than the pink-loving child or the adult who keeps answering out of habit. 

    And here is the truth: you do not need to find “her.” You already are her. She is the person you have been quietly growing into.

  • To Anyone Who Has Ever Felt Unsure

    Image from Getty Images

    There is something complicated about having it all together. Not because it adds new stressors, but because poise can be a facade. It is you, your self-doubt, and your goals against the world.

    We live in a fast-moving civilization that constantly progresses us to chase bigger outcomes. We are handed dopamine hits disguised as transformation. But what if you still aren’t quite sure what you want? What if the revitalized act of buying a new retinol became less about “recovery” and more about the excitement of trying something new. 

    This is a love letter to those facing uncertainty. To the planned auto-payment on your car. The natural deodorant with excellent reviews but melted like milk on your armpits at the gym (sorry!). To the lilac-scented candle that fumigates your kitchen after you disgustingly botched a 4-step alfredo recipe and now your kitchen smells like burnt cheese.

    When we over-romanticize too much and fixate on the end result, your life begins to feel less in your control – it becomes living in autopilot. It begins losing your present self in worrying that your future isn’t good enough. It’s falling further and further down the rabbit hole. But it’s not about being complete: it’s about being real.

    For me, my bedtime routine is one of the few times in my day in which I feel in control. We are taught to be perfect – that being human is a defect. But it is perfectly okay to be blemished and a little vain. It is not greedy to selfishly love yourself. You are healing yourself in a way that no influencer ever could.

    So if you’ve ever felt unsure about your career path, your five-year plan, your skin texture, your love life, or what milk you should use please remember that you are not alone. Uncertainty doesn’t mean that you are lost. It means you are paying attention.

    Sometimes, you don’t need a breakthrough. You just need a moment. Lighting a candle. Washing your face. Cleaning alfredo sauce off of your stove while listening to “Unwritten.”

    You don’t owe the world clarity in order to be taken seriously. You don’t need to be perfectly polished to feel powerful.

    Even if all you did today was survive (and scrub alfredo sauce off the stove) that is enough. You are enough.